Tomorrow is my son’s first birthday party. My husband left Thursday night for graduation weekend at his alma mater, an event he hasn’t been able to attend in over 15 years. I was happy to have him go, he’s been stressed out lately and definitely needed a little man time. But it hasn’t been a cake walk since he left.
I’m busy trying to get the house and yard ready for guests, shopping for food, choosing everyone’s outfits, on top of my normal day to day stuff and two toddlers. Jr just started walking, and now he won’t stop. He’s already climbing on furniture.(must be a boy thing!) I’ve been managing surprisingly well, and I’m pretty darn proud of myself for it.
I have one more run to make after Jr wakes up from his nap, and have to finish mopping the kitchen and cleaning the bathroom, and then my chores will basically be finished. The best part of it all is that I’ve been too busy trying to get everything done that I haven’t really had time to be depressed. I’ve been talking to God the past few days and I think he’s been giving me strength. The power of prayer truly is incredible!
One thing that I never had in my life growing up was religion. My family just didn’t practice spirituality. I have a great-aunt who says Grace before Thanksgiving, but that is literally the extent of it. As a mom, I don’t want my children growing up that way. I thought of myself as agnostic/atheist for most of my life, and never wanted to have kids or even get married. But ALL of that changed the day I met my husband.
We’ve been married for three and a half years, and have a 2 year old and almost 1 year old. Something changed in me, and I believe the force driving that change was God. My husband and I have tried out a few different churches since we’ve been together, but haven’t found the right fit yet.
I have started learning about the different Christian denominations, and trying to talk to God lately, and it has drastically changed my outlook on life. But I always feel self-conscious when I pray. Nobody ever really taught me how to pray, I basically just wing it (like everything else) and hope that I’m doing it right.
My daughter and I have been praying together before bed, and reading toddler Bible stories. I tell her this is our time to talk to God, thank Him for our blessings, and ask Him for guidance in our lives.
I know that eventually we’ll find the right church for our families, but for now I’m just trying to do the best that I can with the resources I have available.